An easy self-care practice

When things feel hard and your sense of security is shaky, it can be helpful to notice supportive, easy, pleasant things you get to take for granted. It’s a practice I’ve found comforting and steadying when things feel wobbly, scary or overwhelming… Also, it’s easy! (Requires no appointment or special equipment.)

Here are a few things from my get-to-take-for-granted list:

1. The ground. When I wake up in the morning I don’t have to wonder, is the ground going to be there to meet my feet when I get out of bed? No. I get to take it for granted. In moments of unsteadiness or nervous system activation, I can always come back to noticing the ground. (And I swear, sometimes I think it’s saying to me: “Lean back, Heidi, I’ve got you.”
2. Darkness. I love getting to take for granted the darkness at night, especially as I am falling asleep. How kind of our Earth to draw the blinds on light so we can shut off our attention and rest.
3. The sun rising and setting. I notice the length of days getting a little longer again. And that springtime is up ahead. And with it seeds and seedlings and vegetables, and my hands digging in dirt.
4. My Yorkshire Gold cup of tea in the morning. My sweetie gets up before me and has my cup of tea ready when I get up. He has been doing this for so long now that I get to take it for granted. I like noticing that. And I feel lucky.
5. My thrifted Cashmere sweaters. Whenever I put on a Cashmere sweater—no matter what I may be wearing from waist down—I feel luxurious and comforted. Once upon a time, Cashmere was a one-time thing. Then it was once-in-a-while. And one day I said to myself, whyever isn’t this an everyday thing? And then it was. I love thrifting—which I can do online—which makes getting to take Cashmere for granted every day completely affordable. Cashmere as self-care!
6. My 9:15 AM Saturday yoga classes with Jenna Hussey via Zoom. Jenna is AWESOME. Every week she sends out an email with the Zoom link for the following class. (Thanks, Jenna. I get to take your class for granted!) Her class is by donation. And did I mention she is awesome? (If you want to get the link to Jenna’s next class, just email her and ask. Tell her I sent you.)

Noticing what I get to take for granted doesn’t mean I deny the fact that there are things I don’t get to take for granted. These days I miss receiving hands-on professional massage. (Sometimes my sweetie tries but it’s not the same, if you know what I mean.) Yeah, I miss massages. I also miss touching my clients therapeutically, and the entire hands-on aspect of Heidi’s Table (which is still on hold). I also miss going to a restaurant and having food brought to my table. And unmasked strangers.

And you? What do you get to take for granted these days? And what do you miss? Please tell, I’d love to know. Pop me an email or better yet, add a comment to this post so that others can see as well.

Stock your wellness pantry!

I’d like to offer you 25% off the cost of any classes I am offering via Zoom including The Pause, a body-oriented meditation class (meets four times a week, drop-in, no experience necessary) and my upcoming Therapeutic Self-Massage Class on Monday, January 18. To receive this special rate, please enter coupon code “twentyfive” on the checkout page of your purchase. The coupon is valid through Friday, January 15. Come fill your “wellness pantry” up with some some self-care goodies from Heidi’s Table.

Warmly (in Cashmere, naturally),

xoHeidi

The post Difficult times call for easy self-care! Stock your wellness pantry with self-care goodies appeared first on Heidi's Table.

And I just love it!

The act of making art or in some way giving expression to heartbreak means that the whole thing about that ache won’t have to come out sideways.

Come out sideways?

Yes. “Coming out sideways” is the expression I use to describe what happens when things that want and need expression don’t get acknowledgment or direct expression. And then because they still are needing acknowledgment and expression they end up coming out indirectly, often in unpleasant and painful ways. Or in reactive ways that we later regret. Either way —bottled up or hidden away inside, or reactive outwardly— painful.

Like when you’re angry but you have a thing about anger (like, for example, you don’t think it’s kind to express anger) so then instead of having a conversation in which you acknowledge your anger and talk about the situation that brought it about you end up just sucking it up and smiling but inside yourself, or with other people, you’re all ohmygod…grrrrrrr! And then one day, or maybe even just 5 minutes later, you snap or say something snarky, which then you might quickly follow it up with a “just kidding!” That’s an example of anger coming out sideways.

Like knots and tension in your body. Oftentimes that kink in your neck has little, maybe even nothing, to do with your pillow. And all to do with some heartache, grief or some hard or confusing thing that doesn’t otherwise have expression or resolution. Knots and patterns of tension in your body can be examples of something coming out sideways.

Like reactivity. Like when you bite your sweetie’s head off, or yell at your kid, or flip the guy in traffic the finger… Reactivity and irritability, be it toward people dear to you or strangers in traffic, are examples of things coming out sideways.

So, what about you? Is there something eating at you, something waking you up in the middle of the night, some disappointment that feels too hard to carry, or some something that seems too complicated, or maybe even impossible, to put into words?

Making your broken heart into art

“But I’m not an artist like Leah!” you might be saying.

To which I say, “No matter!”And also, “Says who?” And also, “Can you really know that?!”

Making art out of heartbreak or grief or sadness or anger, can happen in so many ways! (And if the word “artist” throws you or makes you want to argue about whether or not you are, then think of it as in some way giving outward expression to what’s inside.)

Paints, pencils, crayons… Yes.

Poetry, prose, or just a free-write in your journal… Yes.

A song in the shower? Yes.

Moving to the sound of a song that says it so well for you? Yes.

Telling the thing to a friend or therapist? Yes.

Asking your dreams to help you before you fall asleep and then writing them down first thing in the morning? Yes.

The possibilities for expression are endless. And they can be private (you don’t have to show the world, unless you want to, of course!). The important part, the part that will offer you and your body all the benefit, lies in the act of expression.

All for today. Onward, dear reader. Best wishes to you in making your art and expressing things so they don’t have to come out sideways.

xo

Heidi

P.S. More of Leah’s art can be found at https://www.facebook.com/art.by.Leah.Piken.Kolidas/

[Post edited on 13 Feb. 2017]

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